My Girls

My children are amazing in so many ways. Frustrating in even more ways some days, but a genuine pleasure most of the time.

Sometimes I look at Unruly and I'm truly amazed by everything she is becoming. I think "I grew you in my body. You were in my body, and now you're here and continuing to amaze me every day," and for a moment, I'm awed by the wonder of it all. She started so tiny, so very helpless and needy and is growing so quickly to be independent, curious, funny, amazing, sympathetic and caring and everything else that makes her who she is. I was watching her last night, loving those blue/green eyes, a delightful combination of her father and I, delighting in that infectious smile and carefree laugh combined with a strong, lithe, capable little body and amazing mind. We made all that, created it and nurtured her and it can do nothing but grow more fantastic and amazing.

It's different for me watching Wild grow up. Different in a way that I didn't create her, but I am helping form her and grow her into a beautiful young woman. She is as different from her sister as the sun is from the moon, the sea from a pond, a flower from a tree. She is quiet and introspective, thoughtful and oh so incredibly sensitive. She can be quick to laugh, but even faster to take things far too seriously for a girl of such a tender age. She can be strong in one moment and emotionally needy the next and everything in between, without warning. And she is trying to grow up far too fast. Slow down! Don't try to be a grown up quite yet because once you're there, you can never go back and you'll always wish "If only I could have been young a little bit longer..."

She has been hurt by the one who is supposed to love her above all things, and she has persevered and grown stronger each year. With each disappointment she stands a little straighter, but the little girl inside her cries. I can do nothing but love her and hold her and promise never to abandon her. And I never will, no matter how frustrating she becomes, I'll always be there, waiting for those moments when she just needs mom.