Saturday, September 13, 2008

The union reps

We're here to speak to management. We'd like to lodge a complaint. We've heard rumors. Rumors from the chickens that can't possibly be accurate. Rumors about roasting pans. cranberry/walnut stuffing and mashed potatoes and some human holiday known as "Thanksgiving." We don't like what we've heard.

The rumors are true. Yes. But you haven't been helping your cause much lately. I seem to recall seeing all of you eating my rosemary, thyme and basil. That's called "self-basting," you know.

WHAT?! We're OUTTA here! That big grey horse is eating again, I think we'll go steal some of his breakfast.


A. di :) said...


Sona said...

Don't name them if you're going to eat them.

Kathy said...

Oh my word! This is just way too funny. I am still giggling. We also want pictures of roasted brown fresh turkey. Oh mY! And I bet that you did name them...... I remember the lamb called 'Sledge Hammer'....oy

Wendy said...

now they just need to eat a little lemon and butter and you're good to go!

Tristan said...

I would say,"listen guys you better get your featherless butts back to that chicken coop or I`ll turn you into a Thanksgiving dinner!"

Krista said...

A ha ha ha ha! That's awesome!

Jenn said...

a. di...I look at them strutting around the property and think I'll miss them...but then think about a big, juicy turkey on the table.

sona...only the white one got a name. Wild dubbed him "Gollum" when he severed one of his toes by getting it caught in the chicken wire. The others are just "The Turkeys."

Kathy...maybe I'll post some pictures of "processing day" and then post the roasted, juicy turkey. I'm on the hunt for a pot big enough that will actually hold the birds for scalding. The biggest one is easily 25-30 pounds right now, when he stands next to me his head comes up past my waist. "Sledge Hammer"...that brings back some memories! I sure had s sick sense of humor. Oh, wait. I still do.

Wendy...they've been munching on kitchen scraps, too. All the leftovers, they get. I'm just wondering what watermelon rind and spinach will add to the flavoring...hmmm. *grin*

Tristan...ROFL! They haven't been listening very well...I said "Hey! Get your butts out of my garden or I'll eat you!" And they looked at me and said "Gobble gobble!"

Krista...I always thought turkeys were pretty dumb birds (you can't get much dumber than chickens) but they've proven to be pretty smart. I wouldn't doubt if they knew what was coming they'd form a committee and try to change it. Or just run away and join their wild turkey friends.

Jim Thomsen said...

Maybe you should let them have Wild Turkey. Y'know ... to enhance their flavor. And anesthetize them against the hatchet blade.