Monday, October 08, 2007

How to waste an inordinate amount of time and have nothing to show for it

How to spend a weekend doing absolutely nothing, or, close to absolutely nothing:

1. Wake up late Saturday morning and groan and moan about getting out of bed. Eventually get out of bed and make a VERY late breakfast for the hungry whiners.

2. Step outside. Realize it's too hot to do anything. Bitch that it's too hot in October.

3. Go to Lowe's instead. Browse around for about an hour. Buy nothing.

4. Take the youngest child and the husband out to lunch. Spend an inordinate amount of time eating a VERY late lunch.

5. Get home. Take a nap on the couch. Refuse to make dinner because of the VERY late lunch.

6. Check email. Bitch about laundry not being done. Bitch about the fine layer of dog hair covering everything.

7. Wash and wax the new love of my life, the big black Dodge Ram. Revel in its ultra black shininess.

8. Get on WoW. Play with hubby until 3 a.m. Stay on for another hour after he calls it quits.

Sunday:

1. Wake up VERY, VERY late. Stayed up til 4 a.m. ya know. Playing a computer game. Because I'm a gamer geek.

2. Make breakfast for the hungry whiners.

3. Go on a house cleaning rampage to rid my domicile of the fine layer of dog hair. And dust. One thing about living in the country during harvest season: The dust - it's EVERYWHERE.

4. Go grocery shopping. By myself. Wander around the store and buy exactly everything on my list and nothing extra. I think that's a first. Probably because I left all three kids at home.

5. Take Unruly for a ride and race her around the pasture on the horses a couple of times. Let her win at least once.

6. Make dinner. Which both hungry whiners refuse to eat because it's not spaghetti, pizza or McNuggets.

7. Watch "Weeds," "Californication," and "CSI: one of those cities."

8. Get back on WoW and play for an hour.

9. Go to bed after throwing a load of wash in.

See how easy that was? A no nonsense, non busy, mostly relaxing weekend!

10 comments:

MP said...

Last night we got home from our trip..and I had shows on. I was pissed at myself for not totally unpacking, getting the landrey done and going to bed. I hate it when I put stuff off...it has to get down anyway.

SO what is a late breakfast? Getting up at 10am isn't a bad deal. I had to get up at 7:00 Saturday morning..that sucked.

Hopefully this is our last day of HOT.

Jenn said...

A late breakfast is around 9:30 a.m. Which is ultra late for us, considering most days we're up around 5 a.m.

Crossing my fingers it's the last day of HOT because I'm sick sick sick of it.

MP said...

Oooo, I forgot to ask before, WTF is WoW

Sona said...

WoW = World of Warcraft - and no, I don't play.

I would die if I stayed up that late. I'm too old now.

Krista said...

Glad to see I'm not the only "gamer widow" who also enjoys it! ;) Although I don't do WoW, I have my own little fun with Puzzle Pirates, I know it's for lame people who don't play real games, but I can still stay up/waste an inordinate amount of time on it!
How is it that entire days go by and you know you've done something, but you're not quite sure what? Like today... laundry, that hasn't been done in so long there was mold growing on my son's bib... ew! and that's about all I got done! (and I promise the laundry wasn't more than a week old, but that was weird!)

Lisa said...

It is comforting to know that other women lump their hubbies in as part of the "children" too. heehee.

Wow. Most days you are up at 5 a.m. Can I get some of your "get up and go" for my hubby? Its not uncommon for him to lay in bed till 3 p.m. on weekends. (He's what you'd call a "hands off" kinda dad.)

amy said...

Sorry, freak.
No one but you would consider that cleaning house, going grocery shopping, throwing in a load of laundry, cooking at least 2 meals, AND finding time/energy to ride horsies is anything close to being a do-nothing or do-next-to-nothing weekend.
A real weekend would be:
Tell the kids to pour their own cereal, read a good book all day, and have pot pies for dinner.
You, my dear, need to learn to indulge in some good ol' whole hearted guilt free LAZINESS!

nell said...

Maybe you and Steve can meet up in WoW, I don't play, but he does, and he's often up playing until 3 am, which is why I get up and make breakfast for the small ones in the morning.

And despite what Amy said above, I think you came about as close as I ever get to doing nothing. Good job!

Nancy @ World Wide Rolves said...

I just saw a very funny WoW episode of South Park. It really has to be viewed - there's no way I can truly explain it...

Jenn said...

Krista...It amazes me too. I can get through a whole day and be exhausted...but not really be able to figure out WHY! It's the baby spit. It grows like mad when left for even an hour. That and sippy cups...ewww!

Lisa...some days the only way I can keep from getting very frustrated with him is to just view him as "one of the kids." Oh my. I can't remember the last time I slept past 9:30 a.m. I would never, ever be able to stay in bed til 3 p.m.

Amy..shush. I'm still trying to master doing very little. You know how hard it is for me to sit still for very long when there is stuff to be done.

Nell...How bizarre would it be if Steve actually played on the same WoW server as we do? I rarely stay up really late playing...usually never past 10:30 p.m. and never before Unruly is in bed at 8:30 p.m.

Nancy...I believe I've seen that one...it was either the WoW spoof or the EverQuest one. South Park always cracks me up, no matter what the topic.